The Girl Me

2 nights ago I went out with a girl that I can’t stop thinking about. Physically she was exactly my type and on top of that, she actually had an amazing personality. We went for drinks at 8pm and had a fun conversation. She had a dry, sarcastic sense of humor and wasn’t afraid to make an offensive joke – perfect for me. We told stories about our childhood, and showed each other funny photos from when we were each 10-years old, and she told me about her pet millipede. We talked about our dating experiences, and this girl had stories even crazier than some of mine.

She has had the unfortunate luck to go on the following dates”

1. She went out with a guy she later found out was a murderer

2. She went out with a guy from Jdate, who turned out to be an Aryan, skinhead, Klan member that tried to hurt her, so she broke his nose

3. And finally (and my personal favorite), after a bit of a dating drought, 2 of her friends took her out on the town, but really brought her to a male whorehouse. She didn’t know what to do, so when the infamous madam said, “What do you want? What is your fantasy? I can make it happen.” She replied, “I’d like a man covered in peanut butter and scrabble pieces.” She just wanted to play scrabble, but the guy showed up with the peanut butter only covering his junk. She didn’t like that, and as she said “I wasn’t going to lick it off of him,” so she didn’t play scrabble and got her money back. (Her friends had the sex). The whole time I was just wondering if it was creamy or chunky.

OK – so we had compatible senses of humor, funny childhood pictures, similar types of friends, and shared stories about getting into legitimately crazy dating situations. This girl was the smoking hot, girl version of me. Seemed perfect!

She told me about her family, and it turned out that her sister is getting married this weekend (in an orthodox, man dance with men, women dance with women party). After talking for 3.5 hours she looked at her watch and said “oh no, I have to get to the airport.” Turned out that she had to pick up her aunt who was flying in from Israel for the wedding (she actually had 4 relatives fly from Israel – all on the same day, but on different flights, so the family was splitting up the airport runs). She said she didn’t realize how late it got, and had expected to leave by 10pm (it was now 11:30). I figured that was a pretty good sign, that I was entertaining enough for her to stay out almost twice as long as she expected.

We walked outside to the valet, and I went to give her a hug and kiss on the cheek. I wasn't sure if she was going for the mouth, or didn’t know that I was going for the cheek but we had a near miss, mouth kiss – awkward, but I didn’t think too much of it. After the hug she said “you smell nice – I wasn’t expecting that.” Well, I am full of surprises. I thanked her and said we should hang out again. She agreed and was off.

The next day (yesterday) around lunchtime I sent her a text that said, “hey. I had fun last night. Hope your airport run was a success. I’d love to take you to dinner after the wedding if you’re game.” I haven’t heard back yet. Do you think she’s just busy with family? Playing a game? Or not interested? This is the first girl in a while that I actually want to hear from, but I think she would have written something back by now if she was interested.

SO HOW WAS LAST NIGHT? I guess I want to date a girl version of myself, but myself may not like me.